I thought friends are supposed to accept who you are & let you
be
But I guess not all my friends are real so I'll just move on
I know they'll come back when they realized they're wrong
But all die, and only who saw the answers will come out alive.
As my eyes become swollen shut and the blood dries to my skin,
Walking in the valley of me.
~*~
Ask The Angels
Tony Ziggi
When your talking to Angels, and the sky is black as night, and
the wind is but a whisper Ask the Angels" Make it
alright" Good love is hard to find, and even harder to keep
around. You never understand why. So you ask the Angels to "
Make it Alright" Sometimes love can be cruel, and it leaves
you sad and blue, but a good love is hard to find. So don't give
up. Try, try, and try, and if it gets too hard, and you want to cry. Keep
on Talkin to the Angels, and they will make it all right. Yeah
when the sky is black as night, and the wind is but a whisper. Ask
the Angels they will make it all right. Whisper Ask the Angels.
Ask the Angels. When your world is spinning around, and crashing
down on you. You look around, and everything is gone. Your love is
on the rocks, and there’s no one to turn to. Ask the Angels to
make it all right. Ask the Angels they'll make it all right. After
all your Hell they will put Heaven beside you. Through all your
love, hate, and pain. A!
sk the Angels to make it all right. When you’re lost, and
outasight. When nothings going right. When your minds a endless
flight. Ask the Angels to make it all right. When all your loves
in vein, and in your heart is just pain. When there’s only you
to blame. Ask the Angels to make it all right. They will take you
out of Hell, and put Heaven beside you. Ask the Angels to make it
all all right.
~*~
Angel
Vanessa Ann Cowart
Angel with your lacy wings
and with your eyes so bright
angel with your golden harp to
sing me through the night
angel your a shining star
do you love me still
i will leave a candle for
you lit
on my window sill
angel with your wings of lace
and the magic in your face
angel do you feel the pain that has
long gone away
angel i cry for you each and every day
~*~
Not truly living
Rebecca J.
Every day I try. Oh I try to be more like you. But its not as easy
as you make it look. You just walk around smiling at the people as
they walk by you. Then one day you smile at me and I just look
away. Trying to hide my pain inside. Now you may think I'm
depressed and maybe I am. But what do you care I'm just a girl
with no smile of her own.
When you smile my face begins to hurt. When I do smile its fugal
and filled with pain. I would give the world to smile like you but
I can't or I wont. so I'm stuck being the girl with on smile of my
own.
Every night I think of ways to die. But then I remember with every
breath I take and with every step I take a piece of me dies. So
I'm thinking I'm half way there. Just need to walk faster and
breath harder. To end this all.
I maybe walking and I maybe breathing but that doesn't mean I'm
truly living. Now you may think I'm depressed more then ever
before but oh well. I'm just the girl with no smile of my
own sitting on the side walk. come and site with me sometime
~*~
"Last Needle"
nolan
I could have been many things, I could have done many things
but i haven't, and those things are gone
so i sit here in anticipation of the future; not knowing what to
excpect
they say that if it is meant to be; it will be
so is this what i am meant to be
High, Scared, Alone, Addicted, Envious, Nervious, Anxious, Weak
I know know that you don't care, these cold eyes are cold for a
reason
through them i often look and stare
i can see nothing clear; everything is bare
i want to say many things, but i cannot show weakness
no, i am far too strong; too strong to care, too strong to feel
I am too strong to say what is inside
and with these feelings i will die, every emotion i tried to hide
Who am I? I am not real, I do not feel
I understand your silence
and you desire for something more, something real
I will never forget, the feelings you made me feel
the fact you will never see this; is a true sign of my weakness
As I lay here with the last needle
I don't want to feel, because feeling causes pain
~*~
Sense
Anthony Scott Fuller
To know too much can hurt
Not enough can hurt more
To see all
Yet eventually go blind
To feel everything
Your senses soon dulled
To love fully
To no love at all
Taste so sweet
Soon turn sour
Smell the roses
And forget the thorns
Listen to words
Which soon become too much
To know too much can hurt
~*~
ALWAYS
KATHERINE JOHNSON
Loneliness filled the room.
Lengthening the shadows
And making the lights flicker.
I float away,
Cruising wave after wave of nothingness.
But my anchor is in loneliness,
And it always pulls me back.
It doesn’t matter if I sleep or not
For I’ll always be tired.
It doesn’t matter how hard I try,
For I’ll always be the same.
A drug-induced, pink cloud may settle,
But that heavy weight in my stomach,
Will chase it away.
The cuts are deep and painful,
And the drugs are obsolete.
Nothing can stop the weight of depression
Dragging me further into the deep.
~*~
HOW I FEEL?
BY: M.O.
I think I need some help.
No, I know I need some help.
Its not because I wanna kill myself,
It?s because I don?t know how.
It?s like I?m spinning so quickly,
But then again it?s me going crazy.
Do I think like this because I?m mental up there,
Or is it because life sucks and it isn?t fair.
I have a messed up life.
Its like every night I cry,
Crying to wish I would die,
Wishing I may, wishing I just might.
It?s hard being me; always mad,
Never sad, but mad because people fuck up & nag.
Everything makes me sick.
Most of the time is because I?m the craziest bitch.
At least that?s what people say,
I don?t give a f#ck; I?m throwing my life away anyway.
People think that I?m such a happy girl,
But they don?t know that their thinking makes me hurl.
Sometimes I think to myself about getting those meds & OD-ing
myself,
But I know that would be cheating my way out.
Everything is shit, especially life.
You may think its great & all, but not in my eyes.
I?m not trying to bitch or anything,
But combine life and me, it?s worth nothing.
It?s not like getting high a lot,
Otherwise, I?d be laughing my wits off.
But shit man!
Everything?s spinning so fast.
I?m crazy as hell,
I go nuts til? my face is pale.
Life! There?s nothing to live for.
It?s like I?m trapped in a room without a door.
There? nowhere to go, nothing to hold on to,
There?s nothing I can f#ckin? do.
The only thing that I can wish for is death.
Maybe then ?The F#cked-Up? will turn into ?The End?.
~*~
Pain of Life
Antonia Bell
I wonder what I can do to help.
A mother and her child not in good health,
On the street at the corner,
On 50th Way and Rain Hop Warner,
A man that shows concern tries to help them out.
But this young girl had some doubts.
She wanted to do what’s best for her baby.
But the man that she is looking at is the one that is crazy.
He would push and shove her all the time.
And he would leave her outside to cry.
The pain that she has been through would make her breakdown.
So she prays to God that one day she would be found.
As she sleeps in the cold winter night,
She hugs her baby and holds her real tight.
Never letting go without a wonder,
She tells her baby girl that she loves her.
Telling her baby who is only four,
“This will all be over,” and snuck out the door.
Right be hind her was that crazy man,
He grabbed her and pushed her right into the sand,
She yelled,” Stop hitting me I ain’t do nothing, you always
have pick and argue about something.”
She begged and she pleaded for him to let go,
But it was too late she wad no more.
The little girl wondered her way outside and said,” Mommy wake
up, I’m here, are you alive?”
The young girl was smart and well educated.
If her mother would of held on she would of made it.
The little girl grew up and lived her life,
She was a lawyer with two kids and did what was right.
She still has flashbacks about what happened that night.
As she still tries to erase it out of her mind,
She said to herself,” I wish that I could turn back the hands
of time.”
~*~
Unavailable
nicole lewis
I asked for a moment of your time but you replied
too quickly that you were unavailable.
Beaming with pride I asked you if you could take a
moment to look at my science project that recently won first
place. Aggravated, you replied you were unavailable.
I sat in my room ,myself, looking at my pride. But with
no one to share the joy with it was not so important anymore.
When I heard the knock-knock on my door I anticipated
it was to talk. My heart sank as all I got was a mumble of
going to work early. As you left my room i followed you
through the hall, down the stairs and to the door only to have
it shut in my face.
I was upset and felt the need for revenge. The need to
be in charge.
I went into the bathroom in all my anguish gazing
through the cupboard at the many bottles before picking one up
and taking more than the recommended dose.
I smiles, feeling in control. I went into my empty room
and laid on my bed for dizziness had taken its toll on my.
As I laid there it was almost as if I was looking at my
own body through cold eyes above my bed.
I did not feel so in control anymore when i could not
move nor scream.
I wanted you now and needed you now more than ever but
again you were unavailable to acquire to my needs. I wanted so
bad just to tell you one more time before i fell into the
darkest sleep that I loved you.
The phone rang only too late because now I was unavailable.
~*~
River of fears, Canyon of Tears
-Amanda Magnus
Sometimes when I lie here
My mind drifts and wanders
And somehow I am no longer here
My mind travels down a river of salty tears, Makes a bend
And enters a canyon of fears
Times of the past, Keeps my mind on a journey
Running slow, walking fast
Shouts and screams flow through my head
It makes my soul hurt
And my heart wish it were dead
Roaming with no walking stick
No help through and through
And it’s demented and sick
Stumbling and falling
The odyssey never ends
My soul is tired and calling
My mind flows through the thoughts of love never shared
She never cried for me, She never cared, She left my soul weak and
dying
She left me there alone and crying
My mind screams for the ride to stop
For me to cease this journey
And end this thought
I need sleep
And yet I lie and wander
I lie and weep
The river never ends
And beyond the canyon
There are still no friends
A never-ending death ride
No way to turn back
No way to run and hide
I do what I can
And face my mental path
With a cigarette in
hand
~*~
Prison
Tsd
The leaves are darker now,
Darker than before.
Let me clear my eyes,
Clear them for the truth.
Just when all is right, everything has changed.
Again.
When will I find my soul,
My soul is truly lost.
I am a living nightmare.
Freedom is away, Freedom is gray, Freedom is lost.
Who are these people.
Who am I…
What the hell is going on.
Let me wake up now.
I am awake.
The leaves are falling again.
Coldness for everyone.
Good, you deserve it.
Bring me the cold…my friend,
I missed you.
Can you save this fucked up soul.
Think you can’t,
I miss myself.
Coldness save me.
I hate you all.
Should I wake up now,
No,
I like the darkness,
Easier to deal with…
The Leaves are gone now…
~*~
love
JASONSMITH
you SCREAM I LOVE YOUas you slit my throat as i lay here
bleeding dieing for your affection we kiss and embrace and
speak of beautiful memories and of times gone by and how THIS
IS OUR FATE and how all HATE IS LOVE and how much we LOVE TO
HATE and the FUNNY FEELING OF COMFORT THAT COMES RIGHT BEFORE
WE ARE RAPED
YOU know exactly what i mean you remember the taste its as
BITTER AS THE PILL ON YOUR TONGUE the you take so you can
forget this f#cked up place.
~*~
What you feel is wrong
Were the words between words
You must repent
Or I will never accept you
I hear them to this day
When I try to feel anything
And again I hear the words
Just be yourself
For what love does a man have
For one who never cries
But for when he is rejected
He cries a tear
Paul Kruse
~*~
THE CHANGE OF TIME
BY JOHN SILLS
THE TIME HAS COME FOR THE PAST
TO PASS.
THE PAST IS FAST TO GO.
AGE IS MUCH TO SLOW.
AS WE PASS, THE TIME IS STILL HERE TO LAST.
WE MIGHT NOT BE HERE FOREVER, BUT AT LEAST WE CAME INSTEAD OF
NEVER.
~*~
Him
Laura Van Haun
Something about him keeps me going back,
just thinking about him makes me lose track of
my rhymes, He's slime, nothing but useless
slime, Why do I waste my time? Oh Yeah, I long to
taste his lips once again, or just to know him as
a friend, Will the waiting ever end? or my shattered
heart mend, Oh the message I would send to make him
understand the pain he's caused but could he even
comprehend? Does his cold heart bleed Oh how I just
want to be freed from his never-ending grasp.
All this backwards bending for him is not worth
hoping for the joining of my hand and his,
forever clasped
~*~
I saw God on a Tuesday night
When the clouds cried out in gloom
The wind sang out a sad lullaby
And swept happiness away with her broom
In the instant of a solemn whisper
The moon began to glow,
The stars twinkled a tad bit brighter
And the river began to flow
The trees began to whisper secrets
Told time and time again
Only to tease those in the forest
Those fools we know as men
In the wind, I smelt His scent
I felt Him in the air
His face took up the entire sky
And rid my soul of despair
Tricia Hanson
~*~
Same Things
carrie Tarnowski
I wake up- it's to early
I get ready and go to school.
The same old boring things
It's the same everyday.
I go to practice
I go home- do homework.
The same old boring things
It's the same everyday.
To my room i must go
The only way to get away from it all.
The same old boring things
It's the same everyday.
~*~
Upon whom shall have the right to take my life
so shall i breath everyday or shall i just fade away?
Every breath i take is full of passion
Passion that makes me feel free like an eagle
The eagle does what it pleases
for that someday i will do the same
Not anybody will be able to hold me from my freedom
for i have the wings of an angle
Soaring through the winds,
the picture of the one i love dashes in my head
For i was too busy to remember my love
It brings me shame to be so selfish
for i have been only thinking of myself
The freedom i so desire
I now have,
but what would it feel like to have everything
but love?
Is love the key to the world that we all live in
My heart hurts to think this way
but everyone is selfish
Is the freedom i so desired so much important that,
I will give up everything for it
I know my love will wait for me
with his open arms he'll stand there everyday
waiting for me to come running into them
Our love together is unbreakable
And without my love I'am not happy
I may have everything that this world can give
but without thee
i can not be happy
I'm only happy when his finger tips touch my body
and his lips come close to mine and away we fly
We fly to a place which no one has seen but our eyes
His love is everything to me
and to give that up, is like taking my air away
Love is something that only comes once
and when you find it, you'll never find another like it
Keep your love tight in your arms and do what come to your heart
Never ever let it go free, run, run
as fast as you can and never let it disappear
For Love is the key to the door that opens our way to the world
Where everything is made up of peace and harmony
Thee words have been spoken and shall never be again
Janaina Moura
~*~
I AM WALKING ON A LONELY PATH
RABBIAJAVAID
I AM WALKING ON A LONELY PATH,
I DON'T KNOW FROM WHERE SHOULD I START,
I WANT TO MAKE EVERY ONE HAPPY BUT I DON'T,
BUT I DON'T KNOW WHO CARES ABOUT ME REALLY,
PEOPLE LOVE ONE PEOPLE LOVE SOME,
I LOVE ALL FAIL TO FIND THE SUM,
I AM WALKING ON A LONELY PATH,
I DON'T KNOW FROM WHERE SHOULD I START,
MATHS PHYSICS ALGEBRA GEOMETRY,
MAKES MY LIFE JUST LIKE MISTERY,
HAPPINESS LAUGHTER SORROWS AND JOYS ,
MAKES MY LIFE LIKE FERTILE SOIL,
SOME TIMES I THINK THAT THIS IS ONLY MY BEND OF MIND,
OTHER WISE WORLD IS FULL WITH BLOOM AND SHINE,
BUT STILL I AM WALKING ON A LONELY PATH,
AND STILL I DON'T KNOW FROM WHERE SHOULD I START,
~*~
MY VISION:
BY JOSE M. RIOS
through my eyes i visualize life's adversities hampered,
diminished by my will to survive. through my eyes i visualize
individuals of all shapes and size accepting of one another,
temporarily visually impaired to foresee beauty from the inside.
through my eyes i visualize a life lived without the conviction
or consequence of demise. seen through my eyes a world of chaos
is tranquility in disguise. an inferno in development evident
from the twinkle in my eye. vanity and envy structuralize hate
and deceit therefore meet their defeat when they greet and
individual who seeks out unity and overall humanitarian
peace. others see cold dark dead end streets while i see the
root to passions that run deep inside. motivating me to continue
to visualize, stay focused and rise, til the event of my demise.
~*~
*** A Dispatchers Heartbreak***
Brandy Allyson McCleaf
Everyday I listened for your voice
your transmission loud and clear
I waited to hear that you were alright
before I relinquished my fear
Today I heard your cries for help
and then an eerie silence on the air
I cried and begged for you to speak again
but I knew you were no longer there
I still listen for your voice each day
I only find it in my dreams
I fight to stay there in sweet slumber
where life is not as it seems
The heartbreak is tremendous
true sorrow with each tear
I would give up anything
to hear you loud and clear
~*~
I watch as he hits my mother I sit helpless in the corner
Out of his view hoping not to be seen
I feel like such a BABY
My mother cries out for help
I refuse to let myself answer
I am so scared as I see his fists go up and down
I wish I could help but I am too much of a baby
I move my hands to wipe my tears, and he hears me
I try to sink lower into the corner, but it doesn't help
He says "Why you little brat"
My mother screams "Leave him alone he is only a baby"
He doesn't stop, Closer and closer he comes
then I see him fall and die
I do not know what my mother has done
But I pray "Thank you god for the relief"
~Raymond Boger
OPEN MIC Part I
OPEN MIC Part II