February, 2002 II

OPEN MIC
February, 2002 - Part II

MY INSPIRATION

-Danielle Nicole Howard

I need a poem for inspiration like I need a piece of gum after an onion

A brush after a windy day

Sneakers after high-heel boots

A hot perm on nappy roots

I need a poem to make me laugh after a good cry

Some poems for me to share

Others only for my eyes

I need a poem for inspiration

I love poems like I love getting older

Or having a new purse on my shoulder

I love reading them over and over

Until I know each one by heart from the start

I need a poem for inspiration

I need inspiration to prevent procrastination so I can accomplish what's good for me

I need a poem like I need olives in my martini

Poems feel good like massages should

Like a tall glass of wine when I've got things on my mind

My poems change depending on what mood I'm in

I write poems for inspiration

~*~

“Thinking of You”

By: Jeff

Every night I go to bed I think of you

In the morning and evening too

At night I think of how nice you are

At light I think of your beautiful smile

Its like a light that shines and helps me through my day

You are the most beautiful girl I’ve ever seen

Its like you are not even a human being

You are like an angel that came to brighten my life

You’ve made me write

You are like the one person I would give my life to save

These words I write thinking of you

While I go through out my day

And while in my bed I lay

These words I write to you my love

To express my love to you

But that’s one thing I can’t do by words alone

I may be shy

But you I will remember

Until the day I die

~*~

True Hearts Beauty
Demetrius Heath

Forbidden love is what it is was.

Many times and times ago.

Then one day they decided not to hide it and to show.

Both loved with a love and in return no regret was made.

They were so in love that even above made note of it.

The stars in the sky couldn’t deny the feelings they shared.

The birds in the blue even implied that their love was true.

The birds in the sky didn’t need one reason why, nor the angels

on earth who was there from birth.

With the sky going blue and not you, your soul seems complete and not obsolete.

As the rumble of the humble even made sounds of tumble.

The ever-clear valley was no challenge for my heart.

Let it bide by its own time, that’s the real sign.

The moon is glowing and it’s showing about to rise in the sky.

This was said to me time and time ago.

That a love was so strong like human bones.

The heavens even knew the sky went, blue two hearts were so true and knew.

It was tame like a bird but had passion of the herds.

Celestial light knew their flight and became something more.

A love that played and yes lay with emotion and commotion in the motion.

Then one day will they pay for an eternity of bliss?

Face demons and even minions of the mist.

Can it be that we must face fate.

It upheld me and compelled me.

Fate we await, time but a sign of the lessons we will learn.

This I delay and worry of now what will be.

True hearts beauty I declare and my soul says its fair.

I let the day be mine, I take it all in time.

This is a reply about the times I felt love that was sent from above.

Never will I again forget such love that one knew and even grew to a new.

My heart is free and I need the sky to pass me bye.

Always I will remember true hearts beauty.

~*~

Retired Gigolo

Isaac O'Bannon

i was so busy being

the good guy this time

that i forgot why

sometimes a little

cynicism can be healthy

i was so busy being

the good guy this time

that i let you

play the same game on me

that I've played so many times.

i was so busy being

the good guy this time

that, intentionally or not,

i let you break my heart.

i was so busy being

the good guy this time

that i forgot that

good guys

always finish last.

~*~

Snow Reminds me
Brandi Tweed

The blue sky reminds me of peace

The trees remind me of solitude

The wind reminds me of the power of nature

And the snow reminds me of you

Snow is cold, but nice to look at

You are cold-hearted, but cute

Snow falls quietly to the ground

Who came quietly into my life? It was you.

Snow can make peoples lives miserable

You destroyed mine for a while

Winter is the best time to go for a walk

And when I was with you I could walk miles

Now me and you are back to 'just friends'

And that's all I want it to be

Snow is my friend, it can be trusted

Because it didn't do what you did to me.

~*~

A Sonnet on Love

13 July 1983
-K.C.Colt

Alas my love,

I love you more than the stars above,

I love you more than any cloudy day,

My love I love you anyway.

I live love and I sleep love galore,

I pray for love, I am love and more.

Just you and I, and me and you,

I truly, truly love you too.

Welcome to my love my sweet

My love is something that can't be beat.

I sing this sonnet to thee,

My love for you I love truly.

Alas my love

I love you more than the stars hangin' above.

~*~

The tenderness
Olga Horunzhaya

They laughed at my candor.

I got used to their jests.

I know with you I'm the tender,

I know with you I'm the best.

Before you I was only bile

They perceived my change in a daze,

As a holy naivety I smiled

To my neighbors out of place.

I don't care the slanderers now

Dressing on the shabby frocks

I look like a spring blooming bough

Growing here among the rocks.

I believe in you. I can presage.

"I've carried your trunks,"- You say

I look like a bird of passage

Which is flying to a distant way.

~*~

Our last and final kiss
S.Shelton

Yes, I remember all times we were together

I thought our love was strong that it would last forever

But now I see your feeling have changed

What I thought would never end has gone and left me

Now stand alone all sad and torn apart

You've played with my feelings and broken my heart

One day you'll be sorry for what you put me though

You'll grow up and realize how much love I had for you

So at night when I lie down to dream and reminisce

I'll always remember our last and final kiss

~*~

the day i went to heaven
lindsay crowe

one day while in a park i felt a feeling to go to the nearest

church so i went to the nearest church as i stepped in i noticed

my feet were off the ground. i was taken to the 1rst pew

while i looked at a picture of jesus his head glowed and he

appeared. i was not scared. he spoke with loud and clear

clear words. then he said "child come hold my hand"

so i did and then i saw the scars i asked him what happened

he replied child i was nailed on a cross and i died 4

your sins then h said come. unfrightened tears fell down my

face and i said i'm ready cause i cant turn my back on god

so then at the pearly gate paul said child u r now safe

from fear. he placed a crown on my had i said will it disenagrate
he said no it was ever lasting then i lifted my wings and sang with the angels

~*~

Real Love
Michael Kinkle

Kiss and Tell

Love and feel

Don't you understand I'm real?

Think I'm right

Think I'm wrong

I could leave you blind and gone

Where am I?

Where are you?

Feeling only what is true

Nothing at all

Nothing I've had

Truly madly leaving me mad

Talk less

Analyze more

Am I the one being the bore?

Of course not

At least not anymore

~*~

Never Again
Tyler G. Matthews

It came to me the other day,

after doing my favorite thing.

A competitive game that takes all your emotion,

frustration, and motion it seems.

But then I thought wow, if we just hadn't lost,

I just wished I could turn back the time.

But life, like that game, is a steep rocky cliff.

The mountain we just couldn't climb.

It hurts but its true to realize that you,

will never be a toddler again.

And a final goodbye, with a hovering sigh,

is a final farewell to a friend.

I ask myself questions like what was the point,

Or why did you even say that?

But I can't change a thing because even these words,

Are mere figures of the past.

There will never be a final at bat,

With the bases loaded and a full count.

Never again will you have that chance,

Because its over, you just struck out.

There will never be another tenth birthday,

The presents are gone and you ate the cake.

And there will never be another trip to the beach,

or that same sunset on the lake.

When the lights go out and you fall asleep,

So ends another day.

We're dreaming and thinking of what the future holds,

While our present slips away.

In kindergarten classes all over the world,

They ask what will you do later on?

But the boy only grins, and wrinkles his chin,

A policeman he replies with a yawn.

So the boy grows up, and follows his dreams,

His childhood is over and done.

Looking into the future way back in the past.

His present burned out like the sun.

~*~

Dear Mother

By Tina Bangerter

Let me tell you how much you really mean to me.

For another woman of your capacity, there could never be.

You are so kind, so warm, so loving and so caring.

You have a heart that is so full for the sharing.

Your words of wisdom, are of great value to me.

The time we have spent, especially.

I wish...I could have been there when you needed me,

as much as you have always been there for me.

But our lives have been dealt with so many different things,

To be able to rise above, will only help us to sing.

I love you My Mother...and I want you to know that I care.

And take to my heart, the words you have shared.

~*~

The Song Of The Wolf
Rosalind Lowe

As shadows fall across the walls,

the wolves howl a tune.

As my candle burns away the night,

as I watch the darkness gloom.

And through this gentle night I sigh,

as I listen to them sing.

The song of the wolf is beauty,

as it brings about the spring.

While high above me sits the moon,

in all its full moon light.

As I sit in peace upon my chair,

as the wolves howl upon the night.

~*~

A Lesson In Life
Danielle Clarke

My Whole Life Changed when you threw me out the door

I realized I Had To grow up I'm a Child No More.

Instead Of doing what would have been right

I broke all the rules and stayed out all night.

I Never Realized how much pain i was causing,

I kept on pushing further without even pausing.

I'm sorry for everything horrible i have done,

i'm sorry for losing my morals and becoming whom i've become.

I wish I could fix and forget my recent past,

that'll never happen inside The torture will last and last.

Can you ever forgive me for putting you through all that pain

I promise Ill try to make it up to you , over and over again

Thank you for telling me you'll love me always and forever

I wont do anything like that to you again, never.

~*~

Marie Celeste
Clive Swift

Black sails hoisted, easterly galed

her shapened sway; rolled asunder

the swell, your bountied tack

of brokered dreams- so bale,

Jolly Rogers dressed in black,

as cabin boys to witchery

yours is the curse to prove, within this

drunken bilge, her thirst to brew

her trickery’s trade-

so through the Tankard’s eye

shall your fate be weighed on

scales, oaken footed, tipped now

t’ ward your gallows’ yard,

chanting and in tune your card

of Taro-shroud, a Reaper’s pace,

black-rigged the run that oils his lace

yet, pincered in her wales these throws,

like seasons to seasons

on the brow of the abyss they

close to a once more familiar score-

the deep Azure your sweet repose.

Usher, becalmed, your dawning Art:

to steer where naked lovers dart

pearl-bursting crystal “Dahnaan” pools

fast afoot on silvered hooves that

carve about that sacred land

Lover’s footprints on golden sands.

Bound, too, in that metre the rhythm of death!

She beats no retreat though becalmed her breath!

Her shimmering patience, sterner still,

is your sullen Requiem’s deepest chill to

etch on driftwood your place of rest

and on your headstone your host

~*~

In The Forest
Sawndra

The tree twists and bends

It appears to be dancing,

fighting for its place.

~*~

This isn't a poem, more a statement of disgust, but don't get me wrong, it's all about this *slaps left side of chest* "love, respect, honor.", nobody seems to have it, everybody is so concerned with such petty shit (he/she did this to me, etc.) why can't we all focus on the problem, LIFE DOESN'T SUCK-PEOPLE SUCK, people fuck things up, you wouldn't have a speeding ticket if that bastard didn't pull you over, or further, if cars weren't invented BLAH BLAH BLAH. Humanity drives me nuts, people label all the time, even if you refuse the fact that you do the same you still do, labels, stereotypes, etc.. Everyone has them everyone uses them, we all think differently, no one is insane they've just been left in the "fixets bar in the toolbox for too long". Soul searching in the thicket, in the outhouse in the sky, in the parkbench, in the huge fucking pill bottle. Pick your pill and take it- bullshit, think outside the godamn gerbal cage and accept the possibility that there is nothing after we die, you have on life to live so live it well, do what you can to make an impact towards love. War is in the imagination Dream, Love, Be. Let's push what we've started towards something productive, enough of this racist, stereotype, hypocritical, lying, apathetic crap. Stop it all.

Trevor Unclescrotore

~*~

Worlds Apart
Robert Simmons

If we're all planets than you would be Venus

And I would be Mars

Floating around the stars

Floating around but never too close

Never getting to meet each other ,

But

I still love you even though our paths

Will never cross

We will always be together

In my heart

So spin around and tell me what you see

And if you tell me

I'll try to set you free from

Spinning around the same way

All the time

Please just listen to me

And I'll set you free

~*~

Hard To Rhyme
figo

Poems are hard,

Poetry is not the best I am at.

To rhyme is hard,

And to make the poem I’m writing.

It’s not very easy to write one,

I wish I could write better,

Poems as well as other people do.

Poetry is hard but,

I still like it and like to,

Read poems like the one I read.

When I try to write poems,

And make then rhyme its really hard.

I can’t find the right words to say.

Last year I didn’t write,

More than three poems.

When I was in Portugal,

I wasn’t very good at it either.

Poems are hard and I wish,

I could write a really good one,

Some day…

~*~

"vapors"

Shawnee H.

philosophy talk to me

and tell me what you want

from this maze of life

and seeming endless nowheres

where i somehow feel you

and everything you are

and i don't want to come back down

from this cloud

where i see the truth

that sleeps inside of you

let it fade into life

where i can grasp a small portion

in my fist

my knuckles white with hope

the vapors of you renew

something within me

~*~

A Fate No More
Nimesh Perera

From a distance I see you, shared no spoken

words, a name only dreamt of. Yet I can see

all that is you. A sonnet could be written

just of the immense beauty of your eyes. A

face that inspires a man to breath. A smile

that takes my breath away. My world of days

before revolved entirely around an

unwavering confidence that fate was not just

a word spoken, but that which was relished

as life. Destiny had allowed that which is

my heart to dream of all that would be. Yet

all it has shown me is you. I will no longer

look into the skies above in search of a

shooting star. I will no longer pick the

petals off that perfect rose in hope that

you love me. I will no longer listen, when

the wind only speaks of your name. For you

are not here by my side. Thus, I banish all

that is destiny to be my fate.

~*~

Everyday passes not one day do i stop thinkin about u

Everything u do

Everything u say

Everyway u look

I never forget

But when you are gone i am afraid

Afraid of losing these memories these words these faces

So don't leave me cause without u i have nothing

~NAUREEN~

This naureen for you i do

To show you how much i care for you

Your few words mean the world to me

And this is how I want you to see

~JAMIL~

~*~

"You are always there"
hm skaines

When I need someone

you are always there

my troubles you would share

because you are always there

I can depend on your help

in my deepest despair

you never think of yourself

for me you are always there

you tenderly hold my hand

and try to understand

you are forever aware

because you are always there

just thinking of you is not enough

a person like you is so rare

your love comes from the heart

I know you will always be there

~*~

The Dream

In Memory of Tommy Hunt (1955-2001)

By: Lisa Carter

Last night i had a dream,

I dreamed i went to heaven.

There was, at first, a strange light,

Everything was gold and white.

I saw those pretty pearly gates,

And a very familiar face.

As i walked closer i began to shake,

My stomach ached and my knees felt weak,

When he spoke a tear rolled down my cheek.

At that moment i knew we had met again,

He was my daddy and my true best friend.

~*~

Lazy Pete's Lazy Hat

By Patrick P.

Lazy Pete’s Lazy Hat

Was a crazy lazy hat

A hat that was flat

It scared people on the street

It didn’t even get a greet

The Lazy Flat Hat

Was made out of rags

Like dirty old flags

It was sewed with hair

And it even had a jeans flare

Lazy Pete’s Lazy Hat

Blew away a lot

And then it fell and went plot

People stepped on it

And sometimes they even gave it grit

That’s Lazy Pete’s Lazy Hat that was flat

~*~

leaving me helpless

and leaving me behind

that's all you did,

it messed with my mind

i'll return to the river

i'll drown my sorrow

death will be fed

right now, before tomorrow

i walk in the water

to never return

there is no point to life

when will people learn?

i tie myself to a rock

and roll it in the deep

where air from my chest

will slowly seep

i look up at the water

at the ripples i made

they are the last things i see

as my life starts to fade. . .

bec

~*~

Graceful Rain
Vicki

Unbearable pain

Seeps in

Through my weakened brain

Superfluous amounts

Too much to handle

Too much to count

Graceful rain

Rolls gently down

My stormy face

Raging thunderstorm

Joins the surplus

Of emotional imbalance

Temporary insanity

Like bolts of lightning

Stands out in the darkness

Unbearable pain

Seeps out

Through my opened vein

~*~

My bed was cold

when i got in it.

The sheets slowly

became warmer

from the heat of my body.

It is a simple comfort, warmth,

but not everyone can

attain it so easily.

Nikolaus Voelz

~*~

Living in the ocean
by Jason Jackon

I have lived here forever

all around me is blue

were ever i go

the blue is still with me

for ever to go

i have never seen the out sight

it has been blue for me

down here is lonely

no friends for me

what is this blue thing?

doing all around me.

~*~

My life is in black and white.

My life was shattered when my family had a fight.

So they stick me in the middle.

What do I say? Do I speak? Do I stray?

Am I meant to hear what my family has to say?

I know what to speak! I know what to say!

They look at me, they know what I said, they heard me...but they ignored me

Does my opinion not count in this family of mine?

I am black, I am white, was I not supposed to hear you fight?

Well sorry, I heard, and this is what I have to say!

You stick me in the middle and ignore what I say

Now I’m taking a stand, so step out of my way

You ask what's wrong. And want to know how I feel

Didn’t you listen, didn’t you hear, my life, my story, my dream, my fear?

Can’t you hear me? Can’t you see the life I’m living? NO!

Now I’m unwanted, unloved, unheard. So watch out world here I come!

To take another stands, to be seen, and be heard.

Now I’ve told you my life, now tell me yours. Is it in black, is it in white.

Did you to hear the fight? Now you know what it's like in black, in white.

Jessica Panker

~*~

Sunset Beach
Katy

Picture it, sunset

Sitting on a rock looking out onto the

Ocean

Hungering to be apart of something

So beautiful,

So rich in life

On one side of your oceans view are dolphins,

Beautiful, majestic.

Reality.

On the other side of the oceans view is a

Mermaid,

Lovely, delicate

Fantasy.

Signifying that when we are all

Alone,

Hungering to be apart of the ocean,

That there is no barrier between

Reality and

Fantasy.

It's all just

One,

Everything's

Perfect.

~*~

DREARY DAY
Christy Ann Martine

Hiding away

On this dark and dreary day

No one can see me now

I’ll search within myself somehow

For something that makes sense

In life’s false pretense

Time just slips away

The sky a dismal ashen gray

My numbness won’t allow

Me to feel right now

Cynical in my own defense

Happiness is all past tense

Nothing left for me to say

No one cares anyway

On this dark and dreary day

~*~

Man O Man
Ganesh

With a loud cry he comes to earth

His little mind accepts everything

He goes to school with loud cry

Loves to play and to roam around

Traverse the path with a bit of hatred

And now leaves the school with a loud cry

Out he comes to the real world

Lost, in search of his own identity

Craves for respect and pride he cries

Picks any path to reach his goal

Some go rude some go smooth

Now he needs a true companion

To make up a sweet family for his own

With a wild vigor he earns to live

But years make him weak and old

Now looks back and wonders what he achieved

Ashamed, his head goes down

Feels how selfish he lived

But nothing much left out for himself

Regrets, with loud cry he leaves earth.

~*~

Deceptive Foam
Kristina Walls

Rivers of cotton

In smoke-filled forms

Tremble and slink sluggishly forth

With continuous advancing haste

Joining familiar company

They merge, molding taut shadows

Orbiting an irate soul

Winged and faster it twists

‘Til under the eaves

There lies turmoil

A tunnel of isolation

Wields detriment to those beneath

Like his unexpected coming

The beast is craven and retreats

To the swirling deceptive foam

The river in the sky

~*~

A MANUMIT DOES NOT THINK TO HIDE
Darrell J Smith

Free -

Yes, free -

Yes, I am free -

Yes, I said I am free -

I am yet to believe what I can see -

This is an instant -

A fleeting glimpse -

A fast passing time -

A chance to act -

React -

To make a run for it -

Seize the moment -

Take a course of action -

A reaction -

Scope for a new start -

Before they turn and see...

I was free -

Yes, free -

Yes, I was free.

~*~

Cant have you\The crush
Jeff Charvat

As days go by all I can do is cry,

Because I cant have you.

All this drama makes me blue.

It hurts everytime you leave me

on the drop of a dime.

The truth is

You are his

I came to grip with this reality

That I cant be with you for all eternity

My heart yearns and my mind burns

To the thoughts of you

So all I can do as days go by

Is cry

~*~

Reminisce

Nicholas Cains

I thought about this time and time,

now the world is going off just to take my friend.

If I didn't anything one time in the hall,

I just didn't see,hear, or notice that's all.

I thought that you'd stay right here with me forever.

Just me and you we'd go through this world together.

I wish that it didn't have to be like this.

I want the world to know about the girl I miss.

You have no idea about the nights I've spent.

I try to block it out but, it plays again.

And again, that's how my life's gonna be.

I wish you knew how much you mean to me.

I love you, I hope you feel the same.

I even like the way you say my name.

Tears to cry and words to write.

Even though we never fight.

Look into the sky and see a star,

I can still see your smile from afar.

Now all I can do is reminisce,

what I wouldn't do for just...one...kiss.

~*~

"Timebox"
"Jerry "

My tender heart, the sorrowed moon

awakened shadows, left to soon

Majestic theatre, blinding light

fantastic antics, goals in sight

flooding waters, realized dreams

holding feelings, light that beams

closing doors, locked inside

stressing out, try to hide

darkening casts, evening stroll

forever time, endless roll

~*~

city walls
jamie

the machine gun posts that stand upper-most in the corners of your mind

the laughing clowns for gunmen that are laughing all the time

i stayed awake all night to build my city walls

picturesque ornamental gardens and rippling water falls

the buildings are not finished yet the roads are not done

i am not happy when i work beneath the sun

the best part of me was killed on night when those things came out to play

just as they arrived they turned and ran away

the clowns reacted by gunfire attacked the monsters in my head

the gardens where destroyed and the church bells fell dead

i looked at my city and that i must obey

the sun along its distance and the moon upon its way

~*~

Now, I know... But it's too late
Trinh Tran

You sent me a look

I took a long time

to understand it.

But it was unknown.

Time is gone

You and I

are still alone.

One day,

you took my hand in yours

Came close and gave me

a goodbye kiss, the last look.

Your look just appears again

on my mind.

But now

I'm here, you there

far away.

I'm thinking and feeling sorry

Because I know the meaning

was in your eyes

You loved me, was it right?

~*~

journey felt not heard
rupert mena

the journey is felt -

not heard.

it's a feeling -

not a word.

and what a painful word

it could be.

is this good for my writing?

is it good for my writing?

all my thoughts are scattered

and no one poem comes to me complete

it require careful cutting

and pasting

for smelling and tasting

the feeling of its journey.

~*~

NEOTHEORALOGICAL NEURON PATTERNS
Justin

Freelance firing squad;

Hair trigger goD in a trigger-whore plod.

White-Nigger. FRAUD.

Do what you do. UNdo.

Through and through this sugary glue

Infinite Fire-

Preaching liar!

Anti-inspire who've UN-inquired;

Invert Inspire,

Fallen Angel choir.

Righteously riled,

Bar-code Smile

Atop an infinite pile of worthless While.

Overcome FORmatting:

format ME:\

negate Negative-sum calculation:

misbegotten Morbid Masturbation.

~*~

Where's The Logic?
Kayla Scott

Watching that rain drip beside my window,

Listening like it was the pain of my heart.

Feeling like it was but the softest touch upon my skin.

Tasting like it was just the sweetest chocolate, melting in my mouth and dripping down my fingertips.

Becoming that rain and sliding with my brothers and sisters down the drainpipe

Struggling to come together and make even the smallest puddle

Why does the rain feel like a piece of my soul, and when it falls, so do I

Sensing what is to come by watching through the eyes of a simple drop of rain

Where is that feel of peace when a storm is brewing, and winds, blowing as if to make a point

Needing a sense of security, so they whistle for attention as I do

Does poetry not say, “ I am but a jumble of words on a piece of paper”?

Do eyes not say, “ I am but a tool to help people guide their way”

And do poets not say “I am but a person who is good with words”

Where is the irony in that, and is it just a coincidence that we are so humble

Tell me now, is there not a reason for night and day, for sun and moon, for even black and white?

Is there a reason for breathing?

And tell me people, is there a reason for being at all?

~*~

Liberty
Santo Ion

I'm sure there was a time

When people knew freedom,

And the real liberty of soul.

Maybe,even now,somewhere in the world,

Somebody stands and watches people fighting.

Where is real liberty?...

In the men who are very far from the people's fight,

Or in the people who are fighting for liberty?...

Maybe You,Stranger,can answer to this little question...

I may write many words about many things

You may talk about many ideas,about anything in the world,

But,where am I and where are You,now,

In this world,in this time?...

~*~

While She Is Away
Tony Lewis-Jones

The moon can’t settle to its work. Our cats,

who know a thing or two about

the cyclical nature of existence,

wander in and out of the kitchen, follow

scents of other animals in the flower-beds.

There is a stillness that does not feel right. It feels

like imminence, like the words we should have

said last night, or not at all, and which

remain unsaid between us. This

emptiness she always leaves behind her

is all-consuming. While she is away

the minutes crumble and the hours decay.

~*~

Beauty sleeps quietly in the midnight shifts

Brown eyes black hair pure exquisites exist

Quiet temptations laid forth not to be touched

As I yearn to love and caress her

Forbidden it hurts to much

Time has passed But my love still last

MY LOVE STILL LAST

The sweet tender touches

Moments of sweet crushes

Use to be lovers now resorting to others

To my one and only

My baby's mother...

Edwin G. Padgett

~*~

The Dark Butterfly
Dustin Paul Jeremiah Shockley

Beneath the notorious moon, thought fantasizes a dark butterfly

A metaphor of fragile and forbidden passion

Alas...Children dream a beautiful twilight journey to cry chocolate rain

I kissed the glorious beast of laughter

Shall my soul whisper unknown devotion in struggle

The joyful bird imagines heaven, Crave desire delicately

Drink down pleasure and bliss

Scheme death with the lyrical rhythm and a velvet chorus

Prospectively harmonize the wicked words, while enduring the rose laden forest

Will reality allure strange emotion or a feasting kindred denial

Dance over the hidden fire happily making romantic love

Look at the fiddlers wrath act pretty and reverent to him

Essence of thirst for beauty, the butterfly dances on ponds of ameretto

Simultaneously society breeds youth enabled by flavour

Civilian authority under a snowy roof of babies breath

Whispers in the night of vanilla seasons

And the valley of grapes that i pioneer across

Dance butterfly, dance

Your fiddler plays the ballad

Act pretty and show your reverence

Or the wrath of the whispering night will make concrete and cardboard

Of your valley of grapes

Do not repent

I am this season, oh, uncommon grace

~*~

I AM
Regina Pearson

I'm told my skin is too fair to be completely black,

I am to black to be white.

I am the epitome of integration, of struggle, of hope and of love.

I am the combination of two races, who became one

who finally integrated,

who finally loved one another,

who finally didn't see skin color as an issue,

I AM UNITY!!!!!

~*~

MY GUARDIAN ANGEL

There's a Guardian Angel in my life

that watches over me and my family.

It doesn't have wings or fly through the air,

but its spirit follows me everywhere.

It doesn't matter where I may be.

When I need its protection, it's there for me.

It's that inner voice I hear at times

or, it can be visual through obvious signs.

My Guardian Angel, a fine job it's doing.

I can count on it to appear on moment's notice.

With its magical powers to protect me from harm,

Its presence is like having a good luck charm.

Guardian Angel, don't ever go away.

You've been with me for as long as I remember.

I need your protection now more than ever.

Guide me, direct me in all my endeavors.

~*~

Stabbed in the Back
By: Demetrius D. Jones

It’s a stupid thing to think about

It’s a cruel thing to do

People do it to everyone

Even people who help them out

People just like you

You try to confront them on it

And then they have the nerve to say,

They were just talkin’ or they were just playin’

But you know what keep your cool,

And say okay

Because they gonna what something from you the next day

Now that next day you forget about the situation

Now, turn around, bam, you just got stabbed in your back

Hold up one second you say

How did I get stabbed in my back?

Sit down and do the multiplication

Yep, that’s right

Believe it or not

You got stabbed in the back

Now you want to kill them,

And hope that they never come back,

And even wish they could live in a shack.

Now, you know how you

Got stabbed in the back.

Now, you know how you

Got stabbed in the back.

~*~

spinning, spinning

languid and torn

i am shuddering in the flames; this Empty warmth.

shadows that strangle me remind me of you:

your tiny almond eyes now bathing in salt.

spinning, I'm spinning

you extricate my spirit from these

trees that stain me, these

trees that penetrate me.

i stand here elated, married to the stucko,

examining your arm that slowly dives into your

iron-soaked

negro jacket sleeve.

you sing me a song about kentucky as i even out the

strings of your overfed hood.

i ask you to spin me: these poisons are dying,

but intoxication is increasing as you kiss

my collar. Only until tuesday will i

gently spin you, you whisper,

for i cannot sleep in sulfur.

Veronica Bardauskis

~*~

Goodbye to my mother who loved me unconditionally

Goodbye to my brothers even though they were sometimes mean

Goodbye to my babysister so innocent and sweet

Goodbye to my cousins who were always there for me

Goodbye to the sun for all its given rays

Goodbye to the rain that kept me cool in a blaze

Most of all goodbye to the who was there until his dying day

He never lied when he said he would be here to stay.

I was appreciated

never underestimated

I was the one he adored

And he never left my heart torn....Goodbye

Vanessa Moreno

~*~

DIRTY ROAD
Warren B.

Twenty miles down the road, I take my first step

Longing for faith and searching for answers.

Is it a Cross or a state of Mind?

Fists full of dirt when I punch at the ground, how cruel it has become,

This road which should have been better, or at least more true

To the innocent traveler.

This dirty road has shaped me; made me a face in the dirt forever.

This dirty road has lead me to a place that is scary and absent of Truth.

Take me away from this place-- I want the best of life,

Free from the choice that delivers my Soul. All I can do is hang on.

Beaten and kicked, not knowing what to trust, the bloody gravel

Flays my dreams. (oh, those selfish, wonderful dreams)

As much as I’d like, it not for me to choose.

This damn dirty road has become me; a part of me that asks the same questions.

This damn dirty road likes to run free in order to punch me.

If I walk away, will there be another road to take?

~*~

Pain
Roxanne

Cradle me in your love-

Save me from these morbid dreams-

Embrace me with your love-

For once i mat feel sane-

Indulge me with your thoughts-

Keep me from that place-

Release me from this pain-.

~*~

I don't understand myself or my feelings.

Half the time I feel like I am just going through the motions of life.

But I want to live. I want to feel alive.

I want to feel the way I do when I am with you.

I want the same euphoria as the first time you told me you loved me,

and every time thereafter.

Why can they be happy and not me?

If depression is only a state of mind, then is happiness too?

Can I just decide one day that i am happy, and that's how i'll feel?

Is anyone truly happy, or are they all lying to themselves?

If beauty is in the eye of the beholder, than who is truly beautiful?

Everyone or no one?

I need to stop pretending, and start being real.

I need to not just live, but be alive.

I need to experience every emotion....everything.

I am young, and I have a lot of time left,

So I need to just be me, and stop fucking around.

If it doesn't kill me, It'll just make me stronger, right?

I need to stop hiding behind my past.

I can't change the past, so I'll just move on.

Yeah, I was molested. Yeah, I was raped. Yeah I was beaten.

But if I can come away from that and still be strong, then shit.

Won't that make me feel better then using it as an excuse to be weak?

I need to be ME - a strong woman,

Who can be loved and love back properly.

I need to be beautiful, and feel beautiful.

I need to be alive, and feel alive.

I need to be able to look at him and tell him the truth about anything,

and know that he still loves me.

And in that simple truth, he will know I love him too.

I AM a strong woman.

I WILL tell the truth.

He DOES love me.

I AM beautiful.

I AM alive.

I AM a strong woman.

I don't need to understand my feelings.

They're mine, and i need to accept them, and take them ,

and use them to become even stronger yet.

A.R.A.

~*~

REDEMPTION

Dave Vahlberg 1:12-1:31 A.M. 1-22-2002

A weary soldier lifts his head,

The Mark on him is clear.

He has fought for Centuries;

And fought now, but a year.

He looks upon a Brother

That he has carried far;

The Battles left behind him now,

The Memories a scar.

His Wounds at last have weakened him

He tries now just to Pray,

For his fallen Brother's Soul, and finds

Redemption on this day.

He lowers now his tear-stained face,

Into the Blood-stained sod.

Truly now the son of Man,

And the son of God.

~*~

ZEN
Pat Flowers

see without

delusion or illusion

think with your heart

eliminate suffering

stop wanting

be compassionate

realize sacrifices great

and small are done for love

do not fear solitude

sit in silence

seek enlightenment

Be still

~*~

lost in a moment
June 2000 Jodi R Collett

so when I want you there

you cant be

and the voices in a whisper

saying it is ok

is just that

a voice I have heard

from someone I knew once cared

and a sigh

lost in the moment

of comfort

lasting just a moment

only to be gone

coming up from the water

trying to catch my breath

with too many things

weighing me down

I think I must have drowned

~*~

I drift away, I reach out.

I wrap my fingers around it, I pull it in.

It brushes my face.

I smell the smell; I thought I had forgotten,

but it can never be forgotten.

I feel the wetness, dripping from my eyes.

You are so far away,

and really are so far away.

You think you are close, and I want you to be.

Did I want to forget the smell?

I can't let go.

I don't know how I should feel.

I have so many thoughts, that you can't understand.

Things change, but not to you.

I pretend they don't,

but I think about them.

When you aren't around.

I wish I could tell you,

but i guess you aren't that close.

Even though I want you to be.

Kelsey Irish

~*~

On Earth
Cheyenne Burton

In time on earth

the hate, will stop

the past has held much more hate

lives destroyed, blood shed

when will it end?

will it end 19 years from now

or 5 minutes from now

can it stop or will it stop

the hate and anger stronger than ever

but within this soul of mine only love

shall flow

~*~

"WHEN A RIVER FLOWS"
Jason Lanzar Rivera

When a river flows

Does anyone really know where it goes

It takes its turns

Diverse

It can easily be used to end a life

Or to save one

To put out a fire that burns

But, what about the fire in one's soul

That fueled by the mind and the heart

With the eyes being the only window to the soul

Look deep into them you'll see a spark

Look deeper and you just may see them glow

I guess that's what they mean when they say

"There's fire in his eyes"

Provided by passion and confined by pride

But, no river can extinguish this flame

No matter how many emotions

No matter how much pain.

~*~

Saving Myself
Katrina Idczak

I sit on the grass

The wind on my face

Enjoying the gentle breeze

I look out into the dark forest

Which is kind of like my mind

Full of things I have lived through

Which I will have to face one day in time

I may look clean, pure and cute on the outside

But inside I am like a stormy cloud

Ready to burst and fill the world with my salty water

Somehow changing it forever

Instead I let this rain out slowly drop by drop

Saving myself from a possible future full of guilt

This gift saves me from what the future may hold

Protecting me like a blanket from cold

~*~

Wisdom
Stephanie Jeannot

Wisdom is in the mirror of the digger

In a passion to find a way of decoding

The blockade on the love I could give you

Driven by intimidation that I might actually

Be telling the truth

Even beats the odds of it being a bad choice

Open your mind to find the wonders

That this mystery holds

Pro Bono, Como se dice, You’d like it

Especially wrapped in the Garden of Eden’s

Mind power to eject a story

Not only will I intensify your smile,

I’ll have your crome standing

~*~

One More Year
Nicole Allbritton

Only one more year

until our lives change forever.

Where we’ll go, what we’ll do

will soon be determined.

The decisions we make in the next year

will effect our future, which is very near.

Reality kicks in and the world opens to us

for us young adults can make quite a fuss.

When that day comes where we leave our youth

all the memories and secrets will reveal their truth.

Sitting with my friends talking about this day

makes me wonder where they’ll go and if anything will stand in their way.

All the memories and laughter will soon be gone

but we’ve all stayed together with a very strong bond.

Time will pass and we’ll live out our dreams

but we’ll never forget how much fun we were as teens.

Only one more year before our lives will start

but all my friends and memories will always remain within my heart.

~*~

Tamagination
By Tampa Sanders

As lovely as you are

You can be seen from afar

All I ever want is to be where you are

If I must live this life

Then I must have you as my wife

Your beauty, your brilliance

Your power, your sheer resilience

I don’t know if your heaven sent

All I know is your heavenly scent

What would you say if I said that I wanted you beside me?

Or that I need your help so please guide me

Because when I’m with you there is no place I’d rather be

I never thought I’d be away from you again

And this sorrowful pain will not end

You say you’re near me I only have to pretend

~*~

A Smart Bomb's Prayer
Curtis Dunlap

Oh! limitless preponderance

Clad in metal skin

Immune to deceit and guile accusations

Directed at a mechanical heart

I dream

Of becoming a servant to humanity

And not man's inhumanities

[KABOOM!]

~*~

Why Couldn't I
Joanna Pyers

Why couldn't I see this about you

Why couldn't I see the way you truly are

you left, never told me you wouldn't be back

you didn't even care if you ripped my heart out

left me here on the ground crying, breaking down

this heart, was one that once belonged to you and only you

for once again I fear to give it away, wondering if they'll do the same

~*~

Tjr tjr tjr tjr tjr tjr
starangel

fjdk sjkdlfjiepo jklds. Ffjdklsijeklfsjidofj? FJeikdlfsdkfjir,fdskl...fjksl. djfkleopfd! fjkdlsjripwfjklds? fhsjkdfjshjskdfuhefjsk hdkfsue fdhjskfuehf.

And those are the words at a stutter when love is found.

~*~

INSANE THOUGHTS
David S. Maraj

Blessed with bloody visions, cursed with endless fear, destruction to common humanity, realizing the end is near.

Hate engulfed societies, blood driven fate, chaotic suicidal tendencies, spun with undying hate.

Fucked up lives of torture, with know one to turn to at all, blood thirsty freaks of nature, never taking there falls.

Extermination of other races, fueled with hidden hate, outlawed immoral religions, damned with psychotic traits.

Sitting on a thrown of blood, drifting into evil love, baptized in eternal fire, dropped like nothing from above.

Born into nothing with a future, constantly making myself bleed, self-torture to dull blades, a self-addiction to potent chemicals and weed.

Death driven killers, the world in eternal need, the world turns to anarchy, because of one bad seed.

A nuclear world war III, world leaders without any nerve, everybody wants to be saved, a fate we don’t deserve.

The world will never learn, how death and blood always will win, what’s in store for the world? A future full of sin.

~*~

Uncomfortably Numb
samantha king

There was a time where I would say

That what defined me was my pain

But now that's changed, though I feel the

same, and it scares me

There was a time I would lie awake

And simply cry for crying's sake, But now

that's changed, no tears are shed, and it

scares me

There was a time That I was hurt

And through my veins cold blood would spurt,

But now that's changed, my wounds are healed,

and it scares me.

How could it be bad, people around me say,

that now you can make it through the day

without the darkness and the sadness and all

the pain surrounding you

To me they are dumb Cause I've become so

f*cking numb,

and, truth be told, it disgusts me.

~*~

"Everytime"
Nina P.

Everything was going fine, until my pain walked in -

I couldn't believe that after all this time, I got that same old grin.

I had myself together... never again would I fall -

and with one little smile... I offered him my all.

He broke my heart so many times...I thought I'd had enough

but as always, when I'm near to him... I'm anything but tough.

Nothing has changed after all these years... the love the hate, and the sorrow...

...Then finally he walked away, my heart crushed in his pocket, and I just stood there with baited breath waiting for him to come back tomorrow

~*~

Peace of Mind
buffbod

Time is short so lets be straight.

Win or lose we’ve all did great

to have a place that we call home

that no one else can call there own.

Weather yours is down an alley

or by a creek in northern Cali.

In the end we’ve done just fine

to have a little peace of mind

~*~

In Desolate Sea

Jeffrey Michael Miller

I'll be your island in desolate sea

And I'll be the comforts that you are to me

And I'll be your strength when you start feeling weak

And I'll be the port you so desperately seek

The waves just get higher and come to a crest

And you're feeling tired and feeling distressed

Sail with the wind and I'll bring you to me

And I'll be your island in desolate sea

~*~

Misunderstood
Beth Dayman

I try to speak...my voice falters

How can I make you understand?

All these years drift between us

I close my eyes...see you before me

Your eyes burn with fire

You were this force unconquerable

a raging sea, you challenged me

Taunted me with the promise in those eyes

Tormented me with cryptic words

My emotions ran high....for you

grOWING and intensifing

You fueled them with your fire

I still hear you calling

It's a distant rumble in my soul.

~*~

HOLDING ON

edward bracero

I hide in my shell, and watch the world go to hell,

the thought of being alive just scares me,

I'm scared to love and I'm scared to live

thought of happiness are like tales from a fairy,

I've walked to the edge and I've tried to look down

but then I lost my balance and slipped,

on my way down I reached out my hand

and grabbed onto the cliff with the tiniest grip,

as I hung in the air I thought of letting go

but maybe my soul can still be found,

so I climbed back up and sat on the edge

too scared to move on and too scared to look down,

I hide in my shell, and watch the world go to hell,

the thought of being alive just scares me.

~*~

Stop... and start

I have everything

and nothing

all at the same time

I know i started

this as a riddle

but all it is

is a rhyme

I wish i knew why

I'm being punished

I've committed no crime

but life

without love

isn't worth a dime

I know you think that

I'm just sitting here

and crying

so I'll stop

and let my heart

start dying

Josh Downard

~*~

My memories of you

CELESTE DESHOTELS

My memories of you are from long ago,

where are you now ill never know,

I was the apple of your eye daddy's little girl,

noone could come between us noone in the world,

I thought I could always run to you and you'd be there,

But now those arms are shut you don't even care,

a peice of my life is missing noone could replace,

the feel of daddy's arms or the love on his face,

hearing him say ''you can do anything you set your mind to'',

''ill always be here to carry you through,

I don't have those words but mostly i don't have you,

ALL i have is a broken heart and my memories of you.

~*~

IT MIGHT ASWELL:
StEvE

I am so sad,

it might aswell be dark,

it might aswell be rainin,

it might aswell be deathly cold,

i might aswell ave not woken up this mornin cause my energys drainin.

I am this angry,

it might aswell be thunderin,

it might aswell be lightenin,

it might aswell be burnin,

i might aswell paint it all f*ckin black cause my life aint never gonna brighten.

I am absolute in my depression,

it might aswell be Armageddon,

it might aswell be the apocalypse,

it might aswell all be engulfed,

i might aswell be dyin

cause all i ave done in this life is alot of sighin.

~*~

: ~ Dream Of The Insomniac ~

The sunset brings in the darkened night

this is thine endless and sleepless plight

I can not closeth thine sleepless eyes

at least until I see the sun start to rise

The time ticks by, my eyes do not shut

everyone normal here thinks i'm a nut

I don't needeth to sleep like some of you do

I stay up all nighteth paying my insomniatic dues

My dreams cometh quickly though

When thine eyes finally close

Hours upon hours, my dreams come to me

Hopeing I do not waketh, you see

For in my deepest slumber, when I am at rest

I know that my body will not faileth this test

But when the sun sets again I'm awake

for it's the daylight my body doesn't take

I'm not a vampire or demon of night

I've just got this endless, sleepless plight

My body clock ticketh and time passes by

For awake I am staying, or at least I shall try

When my head hits the pillow, and I finally sleep

I'm inside these walls of the dreams I do keep

For my mind is a canvas my heart is the paint

don't waketh me up, I'm perfectly quaint

Don't counteth me a loner, a wierdo, a freak-

because the dream of this insomniac is really to sleep!

Tracy Lynn Richardson
~*~

Tears From You
Don

Being dead now I come back as a tear

to caress your cheek and fall from your lip

Taken from you, when to you I grew near

Your love is a cup from which I did sip

Day by day I lived with you in sweet bliss

Amazed by your beauty and your true grace

Captivated by your lips I would kiss

It was a gift just to be in this place

Through good times and bad times and what may be

God did take from thee my life from this land

my love will not alter at all for thee

Eternally we will walk hand in hand

you and you alone is all I see

my one and my only you are to me.

~*~

My Mind Wonders
Smacks Soprano

Sitting down, drifting through space,

Not one thought in my mind, I could trace,

My mind wonders aimlessly, nothing in particular

To focus on

Just thinking about anything that sounds interesting,

Like money, clothes and women,

Ya I know, that seems materialistic,

That’s not me, just what I think about,

My mind wonders aimlessly, thinking about home,

But I never think of going or staying for long,

My mind wonders aimlessly, as I keep to myself,

I am not shy, just thinking of something else,

Wondering where will I be in the next year or two,

Still in school, or a working fool, I don’t know

That’s why I wonder

My mind wonders aimlessly, looking for solutions,

Solutions to questions that complicates matters,

Solutions to questions I shouldn’t even consider,

But do it anyway, because it keeps my mind wondering,

I don’t know why my mind wonders,

Is it to keep me occupied at the time or,

Is it to prevent me from knowing or doing whatever,

It is that I am doing,

I don’t know, I just know that my mind wonders

Aimlessly.

~*~

EMPTY HEART...

What you called love

was nothing more

then shallow words

written on sand

to be washed away

by the waves of the sea

leaving me

with an empty heart....

~*~

a mothers kiss missed
katherine

its the hardest thing in the world...

it hurts so deep inside, deeper than anything ever before

u wish u could have that "perfect life" ... the one you see on movies...

but its so ridiculous, and un-realistic, quite absurd

divorce.... parents just don't understand...

it hurts the kids so much more than the parents

no one gives a shit about if you mind or not...

its just like your suppose to pretend like everything's perfect

and that your okay, but deep down inside you know your no where close

to see her kiss that "special one" she loves, it cant be explained

your thoughts cant be put into words...

you want to die right then and there,

like drop right in front of her, its not even about crying

your thoughts have passed that state,

u sit in ur room and think about a mothers kiss missed.

~*~

Shining in Sentosa Island
SiYing

That day it shine

though we heard thunders behind

Riding on bikes

as though in the nights

along the sides

with cars align

Up slope we went so tired can be

down hill we rode in a breeze how lovely it may be

(i knew you enjoyed that)

Around the bend

what lies ahead of our hands

all went down to a land

no tourists looked tanned

Snap photos i asked

you be my cast

~*~

IN THE LIFE OF SIN, WHAT'S DEAD AGAIN,

LIVES TO PRECEDE THE PATH OF HEAVEN.

RECONSTRUCTION, BLASTS PASTS OF DECEPTION, BORN AGAIN CHRISTIAN.

LIVIN LIFE TO LIMITATION,

BABY ANGELS FLYIN EVERYWHERE TO SAVE HIM.

OPEN DOORS CLOSE DOORS TO LET ME IN.

HYPNOTIZED BY KITES, LIVIN IN OBLIVION.

HELP ME TO SUCCEED A LIFE THAT'S CLEAN,

SHINE BRIGHT TEETH TAKE FLIGHT TO SAVE ME.

SMILE IS A FROWN TO ONE,

ONE WITH NO LOVE BUYS DUBS TO FL0SS A GUN,

PROTECTION OF IMAGE IS NUMBER ONE,

PRIORITIES SKIP BY DISABILITIES,

BLIND CANT SEE, TO BELIEVE,

LIFE OF SIN IS NO WHERE TO BE.

Ken

~*~

The City Where Angels Cry
Curtis Medway

The night is silent and cold as they sleep,

But for some it is filled with tears as they weep.

It is a terrible place to be in the night,

For the dreams of each person are filled with fright.

The sky is covered with a thick layer of smoke,

And so are the minds of the damned who woke,

In the city of angels gasping for breath,

Not realizing how close they have been to death.

The day is silent and cold as they walk,

Because there are terrible eyes watching them talk,

And the people who live and breathe here know,

That society has struck a deadly blow,

On this city of angels that used to be great,

But is now just a breeding ground for suffering and hate.

Back to the first part of February, 2002

Poems Copyright © Designated Authors 2002. Page Copyright © AHApoetry.com 2002. Go check out the AHA Archives for more poetry. If you would like to send in your poem to Open Mic. Go to the AHA!POETRY Homepage for new ideas.

Go to February, 2002 - Part I

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OPEN MIC February, 2002 - Part II

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February, 2002 - Part II